Imagine you are on a boat in the middle of the ocean. You know you want to go somewhere. Let’s say you would like to sail to an island. But you don’t know where you are. So how will you be able to get to the island?

The ancient seafarers that navigated our earth’s oceans knew that there is specific information that is needed to be able to navigate during their journeys. They needed to know their destination, they needed to know the boat they were traveling in. They needed to know about the currents, stars, the sun, the moon and the winds among other things. And most importantly they needed to know where they were starting from.

When we are feeling lost, stuck or overwhelmed, often panic sets in. We desperately try to find a way to get ourselves away from the position we are in, looking for solutions. Sometimes, we get ourselves so worked up that we can’t see a way out or even what’s right in front of us. And sometimes this means that we make decisions that later on in hindsight weren’t the best choice.

Setting aside time to really familiarize ourselves with where we are right now and what we are feeling in this moment, taking stock of our lives, helps us reconnect with ourselves. We stop resisting what is, we surrender, and allow ourselves to ride the wave of emotion and thought.

We give ourselves time and space to really get to the crux of our situation. And it’s this reconnection to self that allows our path forward to be revealed to us without forcing the solution.

Below are 4 really powerful but simple things to consider when taking stock of your life.

Look at your life as a whole.

We often tend to look at only a part of our life when we are feeling stuck. For example, when we feel stuck professionally we look at our career. When our romantic relationship sucks, we look at this part of our life. Mental and physical health, our career, friends, family and relationships are often easily identified as important parts of our life and often get our biggest attention.

But have you ever considered the impact of your finances on your health, your relationships? Or the impact of your physical environment? Or the impact of your personal growth or lack there off? How about the recreational part of your life? You know, the fun stuff like adventures and hobbies.

Stress squashes enjoyment and stress in any area of life will have an impact on your well-being and ultimately your experience of joy in other parts of your life. Different areas of life aren’t perfectly compartmentalized like drawers. They flow into each other like a system of rivers flowing alongside each other, intersecting at different points. Not convinced?

Well, have you ever experienced a break up and noticed how all areas of life are impacted by that? Exactly, a prime example how all parts of our life are interconnected and impact on each other. So start looking at your life as a whole and interconnected web.

How do you measure fulfillment?

Well, what each of us sees as fulfillment varies. We are all incredibly individual people. Not one person has had the same experiences, learnings and challenges in life leaving each of us with a completely unique understanding, unique desires and unique ways of seeing things.

When taking stock of how fulfilled we are in all the different areas of our life, it can be really helpful to create a way of measuring this. It helps our brain understand and process the information more clearly. Let’s face it, us humans love to measure, label and define….

One great way of doing this is using a range of numbers.

For example: On a scale of 1-10 how satisfied am I feeling in my relationships with friends and family? 1 being ‘extremely unhappy’ and 10 being ‘couldn’t be happier’. Now choose a number that reflects your level of satisfaction. Often, the first instinct, number, that comes to mind hits it on the head.

It may feel strange doing this at first, and that’s okay. Try not to judge yourself. There is no right or wrong here. Do this with all areas of life and you will start to get a really good idea of which areas might need some attention first. An inability to tackle an issue can sometimes stem from not knowing where to start and this exercise will help you find some concrete starting points.

Diving deep into your emotional dimension.

Our emotions are part of our human experience. Besides our thoughts, they help us shape our responses and reactions to life. And to really get clear on where we are at in life, we need to understand the emotions we are feeling as a whole and the emotions we are currently associating with the individual area of our life.

When we are not feeling joy in a part of our life, let’s say career, what is it that we are experiencing instead? Sadness, frustration, anger, loneliness, boredom? Whatever it is, let it come to you. Be honest to yourself even if it feels uncomfortable. Allow it to be for the moment. Find acceptance for what you are feeling. It’s okay. It’s valid and so understandable. Again, don’t judge yourself, there is no right or wrong. And your not always going to feel this way because change is a constant in life.

As you feel the emotion, imagine it flowing through you like energy or water. Especially when we are feeling what we deem as uncomfortable, we often resist those emotions. We don’t want to feel them. But that is exactly what we need to allow ourselves to do. The sooner you accept what it is that you are feeling, the sooner you can stop resisting what is. And that is a key component to creating change in our lives.

Create focus.

If you have taken the steps above, you will now have a good idea of which areas of life have the lowest ratings. Choose one area, a maximum of two, that needs the most attention and allow yourself to focus there.

When we spread ourselves too thin, we are spreading our effort and energy across multiple projects and this will have an impact on the quality of the result you are able to achieve. It’s like trying to paint multiple chairs with enough paint for only one or two chairs. How much coverage are you going to get, how vibrant will your result be? What is the quality of your work going to be? And will this mean further touch ups and work down the track meaning more time and material investment. As they say, measure twice, cut once!

So ask yourself, what needs to be present in this chosen area of life for it to be a 10 out of 10? What actions would I need to be taking? How would I be feeling? Allow your ideas to bubble up and try not to judge your answers. This is not about getting it right. This is about getting creative and honest with yourself about your desires.

Are you coming up blank? That’s okay, give yourself some time to discover. It’s not a race.

Whenever my clients and I start working together we establish what life is like for them currently. What areas of life are working for them and what areas aren’t.

We look at what feelings they associate with each area of life and how they would like to feel instead.

We deep dive into every aspect of their life.

And when I say deep dive, no stone gets left unturned!

When my clients start this work, they are often in a space in life where they feel overwhelmed and unhappy, sometimes frustrated and fed up with where they are.

This frustration is resistance to whatever is happening.

A feeling of ‘I don’t wanna be in this situation’.

And again, as mentioned previously, while this is so valid and understandable, letting go of that resistance to what is, is a key aspect to transformation.

You see, here is the thing. When we feel happy emotions, we are really good at embracing them, letting them flow through us. We just are in that moment, we don’t resist it or the energy of the situation.

When we feel what we deem as negative emotions, such emotions that don’t feel good: like sadness, frustration, anger etc.; we often resist these. This shows up as tension in the body, a racing mind, venting the same story of how crap these emotions feel over and over again and not allowing ourselves to express how we really feel deep down.

Of course feeling unhappy, stressed, doesn’t feel good. But when we can understand and come to a place where all these experiences, whether good or bad, are part of our journey and are gifts that help us learn and shape the life we want, are actually us talking to ourselves, sending messages we just need to listen to, we stop resisting what is and just allow it to be part of our story.

So let’s embrace life as it is: A rollercoaster, an adventure, a full spectrum of colour, expression and emotion. It is your life. And this is what always makes for a really great story, a really great life.